Blogging < Writing Letters < Journaling
I have issues with falling asleep for years. And the simplest technique I tried and it helped—watching the old TV shows in bed. Poirot and Columbo are my favourite. I've learnt the episodes by heart, and now, going to bed, I can close my eyes without FOMO and fully relax. I play those series with a voice-over translation into Ukrainian, and the sound of my first language gives me an extra soothing effect, especially after I left my country.
Photo by Jisun Han on Unsplash
When my boyfriend and I started living together, things changed. I began to feel more secure and confident overall, and there were nights, when I was able to fall asleep without "watching" series. However, most of the time I prefer to turn on my laptop and play something, as it became a firm habit. This brings me to unpleasant assumption: I use my falling asleep technique because I am trying to mute my own thoughts, fears and anxieties. Aw.
Life without my third cup of coffee
I lower my daily dose of coffee from four to two cups a day. I reduced my screen time and started to read books around bedtime. I also switched to listening to podcasts on philosophy and psychology. And it helps, but: a) without my normal dose of coffee I am getting sleepy at 8 p.m. b) the books I tend to choose are demanding, and then I go to bed low-spirited or overstimulated c) some episodes are too interesting, so I keep on listening to the podcast instead of focusing on falling asleep.
One night I took my MIDORI1 notebook and began to write down my thoughts. I like to write. I like the restlessness, when I get the idea, the tension, when I search for a proper word, the surprise, when words grow into a paragraph, the relieve, when it's finished, and the distance, I discover between me-as-a-writer and me-as-a-reader. This time was different, though, because I wasn't much concerned about what to write, and centred my attention on my emotions instead2.
Why community matters
This is how I discovered journaling (and I liked the effect it had on me). Thus I am working towards consistency, so that some day it becomes my new falling asleep technique. I get a lot of inspiration from the Bear community. For example, Herman's blog affected me greatly. His posts on slow social media and journaling made me think of the price I pay staying a social media user. And while I still cannot dare to delete my accounts, it's good to have like-minded people around on the Internet.
Now I read more. Not only books, but paper and online magazines, where they publish long texts, interviews, and essays. I wrote an essay myself recently (you can find it on my blog in Ukrainian). I also composed and sent a real letter via email, and already got a reply, which was a fascinating, almost forgotten experience.
When I am no longer that much dependent on likes, I can think more about myself and a recipient of my message. A different person with their own story and background, who is still able to understand and respond to my writing. I don't aim to have an audience, but readers. And when I do blogging, write letters and journal, I am learning to be a better reader myself.
MIDORI is a Japanese brand, where they create elegant (and expensive) paper products. I bought my notebook in January 2025, but was too scared to use it as my writing didn't seem suitable for such kind of product. It took me a lot of therapy sessions to accept that my thoughts are valid and worthy enough, so I started using my notebook now and then.↩
Later I read a brilliant article How to Start Journaling: A Beginner’s Guide written by Jawwad Siddiqui, where he explains, why journaling is not a diary, not therapy, not a productivity system, and not creative writing.↩